Day 20: Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future.
In high school, my friends use to always say I would be the first girl in our group to get married. I do not know whether they said this because they believed it, or just because they wanted to watch me throw a fit. I would get so mad every time anyone would say something like, "You are going to get married right after you graduate." Hearing this only motivated me to hit someone. So I became an enemy against marriage. I decided it was evil. Every time I heard someone lecturing us about how we were suppose to not put off getting married, I wanted to tell them to gag me.
I will get married when I want to get married.
Maybe I won't get married at all.
So I started saying I was never going to get married. I was in denial. I know deep down that I will get married. And I will admit, I want to get married. But it is something I do not want to rush into. I feel like too many people rush into it just because they think they are suppose to. Well, not me. I look up to Audrey Hepburn. I think she is gorgeous inside and out. And I love this quote from her:
"If I get married, I want to be very married."
When I am married, I want to be very married. Totally in love and excited for life with that other person. There are too many divorces nowadays, and I do not want to fall victim to it.
The man I marry will have a sense of humor. We have to be able to laugh about things. He has to be able to put up with my weird-self. Not just put up with it, but appreciate that I am a little odd. I want him to think I am funny, and I will think he is the funniest man alive as well. He will have a wild sense of adventure. I do not want to waste my life away just going through the motions. I want to experience things. I don't even have to experience big things. But the simple, every day things. I want to randomly sing karaoke with him at a restaurant, I want to start a food fight with him in our kitchen. Basically, he has to be fun and take on life in a big way. He will be a provider. This is important. I do not want some lazy man that can't hold a job. I want a man that works hard and likes to work. In return, I will work hard for him. He will love God. I want my husband to have a strong relationship with his Father in Heaven and Savior. I feel this is essential to us having a happy family. He will be patient. I need someone that will be patient with me and all my many flaws. He will love cuddling. If he doesn't love cuddling, that would be a bad situation. He needs to allow me to maul him, and he will maul me back. He will think I am beautiful even when I am having one of those days when I wear things that do not match. And he will especially appreciate it when I look dang good. He will be good with kids. Since we will be having fifty of them. Totally kidding. I do not want fifty kids. Especially after my lesson on childbearing in my Family and Marriage Relations class. Ick. But I still want kids, and we have to be fun parents. He will be creative because I am creative, and I don't think I could handle living all of forever with a complete dud. He will not be afraid to get his hands dirty. If he is a man, he will do man's work. He has to be able to take care of me, work with tools, build fires, and other manly things. He will protect me and make me feel safe. I want to feel comfort every time I hear his voice or feel his arms around me. He will be slightly off-colored about things. Maybe that is a bad thing to want in a husband, but I really do not want some perfect Peter Priesthood guy. I can't live my life afraid of not being perfect for my husband. If he swears once in a while and tells a slightly dirty joke on occasion, then I will know my world is alright. He will play me songs on his guitar. Ahem. He will be honest in everything he does. If he is not honest with others, how can I trust him to be honest with me? He will sincerely care about other people. I want a caring husband, someone who is good with people and makes them feel special. He will be my best friend. My pal.