Just imagine me rapping that title while wearing shades and a chain necklace. Ah yes, that's perfection. Some people claim rapping isn't a talent, but I beg to differ. Because I've tried legit rapping and it's tricky. It's like saying a million tongue twisters right in a row and lots of times the tongue twisters make you want to laugh because they might be slightly off-colored or inappropriate (I do have all edited versions of my favorite rap songs on my iPod, don't judge), yet even though you want to laugh at the slightly naughty stuff you're rapping, you can't laugh because real rappers are stone cold serious.
Whew, that was a mouthful.
You know what else is tricky besides rapping? Changing all your perfect plans for your husband's birthday at last minute because your little sister ends up in the hospital. That's what's tricky. And that happened to me. It really did. And you know what, I think I'll go ahead and tell you about it now.
Brian's birthday was on Sunday. And in my world, when your birthday falls on a weekend, that means you celebrate for three days instead of just one. That means all Saturday afternoon and evening, BWell and I were having fun and consuming more calories than is probably healthy. When we arrived back to our humble abode, we plugged our phones in upstairs since they were dying, and we went back downstairs to be crazy, married party animals for a bit longer. By the time we retired to bed it was about 1 AM. I went to look at my phone and I had a few missed calls from some strange number. The calls came in at around midnight. I told Brian the news about the mystery number. He then looked at his own phone. The same mystery number called him too. Then I looked at my text messages. There were unread texts. . .from the mystery number.
The first text message said:
"I'm at the hospital getting my appendix out."
Then the second one said:
"By the way, this is Lexi."
I wish you could have the chance to meet my little sis, Lexi if you never have. She is a character. She's thirteen and basically a fireball. Earlier that day, Lexi ran the Color Run 5k and before the race began, she kept complaining about her side.
"Guys, my side really hurts. What's wrong with me? Do I need to get my appendix out? Which side are your appendix on? Yep, pretty sure I need to get mine out."
And all the while, we said,
"Lex. Be quiet. You are fine."
Turns out she was right and we were wrong. She really did need to get her appendix removed.
As Brian and I sat in bed, staring at the text messages Lexi had supposedly sent from some strange number, we debated on whether or not this was some rotten prank. Lexi is famous for doing that. She likes to tell tall tales. Maybe she was sleeping over at a friend's house and sent it from their cell phone? Maybe she really was in the hospital, in pain, dying? How were we to know? Lexi would call me and Brian no matter the time if something like this was really happening. She likes us. Well, she mostly just has a crush on Brian. But all the same, she would demand to talk to us before going in for surgery. Short on options and sleep deprived, I replied to the text:
"Are you ok? Wow, your side really did hurt."
And then I went to sleep.
Morning came and I showered Brian with happy birthdays. I was so excited. Months earlier, I had purchased a Wii system for my man. It had found refuge in the back of my closet, carefully hidden by my jackets and sweaters, where Brian would never think to look. My family was coming to Logan to take us to birthday lunch after we went to church. Well, that was the plan anyways. And all the while, I made secret plans to have friends come to our place while we were out eating dinner. Then when we would arrive home, the friends would have the Wii system set up, yell surprise, and we would all eat cake and play Just Dance (my family bought him that game for the bday since I got him a Wii). I knew it was the perfect plan.
But that morning, I got a phone call from my dad. He sounded worn out. He informed me that Lex had indeed had her appendix removed a little after midnight, and they stayed at the hospital all night with her. He apologized and sadly told me we would have to reschedule birthday lunch. Then I talked to my mom. She told me a sad story about Lexi. Hopefully Lexi doesn't beat on me for sharing the story on my blog.
My mom told me that right before they sent Lexi in for surgery, she started sobbing. In between sobs, she said to my mom, "I'm so scared."
My mom tried comforting her and told her there was nothing to worry about, doctors did this type of surgery all the time.
"No, I'm scared because I'm going to ruin Brian's birthday. I just want Brian to have a good birthday, Mom."
When I later told Brian this story, I thought he was going to cry. He and Lex are pals. Then Brian said, "We have to go see her."
So we decided a trip to the hospital would be necessary after church. However, while we were at church, Brian's phone went off (I hate it when he brings that thing to church). He didn't answer, but then it went off again, and again, and again, and again. It was that same mystery number that was actually the doctor's phone. Yeah, my sister seriously asked the doctor if she could use his cell phone before she went into surgery. Now apparently he was letting her use it again. Finally, Brian got up from the pew and went out in the hall so he could answer the phone. Sure enough, it was Alexis on the other end.
"Hang tight, Brian. I'm gonna get out of this place so we can go to dinner."
Apparently my little sister became a crazy person trying to break out of the hospital.
She didn't break out of the hospital though. And we didn't go to birthday dinner. But we did surprise Lexi when we showed up at the hospital with a giant balloon. And because we have some awesome friends, they still came over and set up the Wii. Everything worked out. We ended the day with Better Than Sex Cake, which is entirely a lie, so I'd rather just call it Skor cake.
My sister is alive and appendix-less, my husband is another year older, and I'm tempted to play Mario Brothers on the Wii now rather than study for my final on Friday. Life is good.