Sleepy Head

Lately, I've had this thing called a bedtime. It really is a pretty wonderful thing. I feel bad for ever judging bedtime and thinking it was a rotten idea. You see, sleep and I have always just had a rocky relationship.

Some people are night owls. Others are early birds.

I grew up being neither.

When I was a little girl, I never slept. When I got old enough to walk around and think for myself, I would sneak out of bed and go play inside the toy closet. I never got caught. Then I started teaching Jace my ways when he got old enough. He was not so sneaky and played with a toy that made noise. Mom caught him.

When I was in grade school, we read the BFG (Big Friendly Giant) by Roald Dahl. I remember the giant saying something along the lines of humans slept half their lives away. Giants didn't waste their time sleeping. I firmly agreed with the BFG and began wondering if maybe I was half giant, which would explain my lack of needing sleep.

In high school, I would wander the house at two or three in the morning, then wake up at quarter to seven to get ready for school. My mom would ask me what time I went to bed and comment on how she heard me wandering around. She would then look at me with worry and ask if I was tired. But I never was. I was wide awake and ready for the day. Then I would go to a full day of school, and afterwards have a sport practice of some kind, sometimes along with student council responsibilities or choir related happenings on top of it. Never did I get tired though. When we had morning practices for volleyball or basketball, my friends would want to kill me for being in such a good mood at such an early hour.

If I get too much sleep, I am usually a grouch. Six to seven hours does me wonders. I think I must fall into a deeper sleep, allowing my body and brain to get rested much quicker than the average person. I think I'm cool with that.

Now that I have reached college, I have learned to appreciate sleeping a little more. I don't love it, but it's something I take the time to do now. When I don't get some sleep, I find myself wanting a nap (something I never did before). This semester I made the decision that I would try to be in bed by midnight. I have done a pretty good job. A few nights, I have even been in my covers by 10 or 11. Then, almost every morning, I go to the gym at seven. This bedtime thing is turning me into an early bird. By the time I reach the age of being a real adult (adults like to sleep) I will most likely have transformed into an early bird. Which I am great with. You would be amazed with how much you can get done in one day, if you wake up early and get your day going. Let's get real, most the people that stay up way late are not doing anything useful any ways. They are probably on facebook or watching movies. Really they should just go to bed. Then maybe they could get out of bed before noon.

365 Days

I have been putting off blogging since Friday, because I don't know how to put what I am thinking into words.


Basically, Brian and I have been dating for one whole year!



A lot of people said it seemed weird that we had already been dating a year. Like it went by really fast. I agree. It was fast. Yet at the same time, it blows my mind to think I have only known this boy for 365 days. It feels like years. It feels like a lifetime. It is hard to imagine days when he wasn't my friend.


That is probably the reason we've been together a year and are still going strong. Because we seriously are best friends. The majority of boys I have dated, were not my best friends. A couple were my really good friends, but even then I was a horrible communicator. Bless Brian for having the patience to break down my wall.

I have been thinking a lot lately about where Bri and I were at a year ago. It's so funny to remember the days when I didn't know for sure what he was like. When I was just getting to know him.


I remember vividly sitting on my cousin's bed, when her roommate walked in and told me Brian Weller thought I was cute.

Brian Weller? As in Brian Weller, my home teacher?


I remember the first time we hung out (he counted it as his home teaching might I add) and we made pizza while Shayla was at work. We finished it right when she got back and we all ate it together. The first meal of many more to come, in which I sat at my table with two of my best friends. I remember putting the pizza in the oven, making small talk, and discovering we were both student body presidents.


I remember our first official date. I was nervous about eating at Tandoori Oven. It is an Indian food place inside a sketchy, little gas station. The food is actually superb though. We love it now. I remember going back to his apartment where we bleached t-shirts. I remember telling him about my most awkward kiss story (I must blog about that story eventually). I remember him saying after my story ended, that he better call the band he had lined up for our doorstep and tell them not to come this time. Then I remember being at the doorstep and asking what happened to the band. He smiled and said they took a rain check.


I remember when he informed me he wanted to play me a song on the guitar. My heart fluttered at the thought of dating a musician and I asked if he knew how. He answered, "I can play Mary Had a Little Lamb or Smoke on the Water." I remember thinking after he said that, "Oh, he's one of those boys that thinks he can play." Then I remember when he walked into my apartment, later that night, guitar in hand, ready to play Mary Had a Little Lamb for me. He ripped out the most awesome version of Mary Had a Little Lamb I have ever heard. That wasn't all. He went right in to playing several Rascals Flatt songs, Yellowcard, Edwin Mcain, Relient K. . . .you name it, he probably played it for me that night. And I sat on the couch, with my jaw dropped, and my eyes probably glazed over, being a total girl.


Every day spent with Brian has been an adventure. And I am looking forward to the hundreds of more days to come.


Here are some pictures from our night of celebrating one year. Shayla and Ryan also celebrated with us. We returned to Tandoori Oven, went M&M bowling, and got Coldstone.

My Heart of Jell-O

Some people say I care too much. Sometimes I think I do too. I have this thing that sometimes serves as a gift and other times serves as a curse. This gift/curse is that I hurt for other people. However, I also know how to celebrate with other people. I seem to be able to be in tune with peoples' feelings and almost experience a fragment of what they might be feeling with them. Maybe you think I am lying. But I can't tell you how many times I've stayed up at night worrying about people and wondering how I might be able to help them.

Even people I don't know very well. Or people I don't know at all but just merely observe.

Last year, I started struggling in one of my science classes. I am just not a science/math whiz. At the time, I was on Utah State's track team. My coach pulled me aside and suggested that I get a tutor before my grade was too low. So I gave in and got a tutor, but I was not very happy about it. I hate asking for help. I went into it with a pretty horrible attitude. I remember meeting my tutor for the first time; I was disgusted. He did not have the best hygiene. I did not want him to breathe on me. He wore old polo shirts that were almost completely faded of color. He was also pretty peculiar. I did not look forward to spending two nights a week with this character.

As time passed though, I grew quite fond of him. He was really nice and very patient with me. He also laughed when I did funny stuff, which made me like him a lot too. I found myself getting attached to my tutor, even if he was a little nerd. My grade also improved drastically. I aced the final and ended up getting an A in the class. I owe it all to him. I would have probably earned myself a C without his help.

I decided I wanted to get him a little Christmas/thank you present for our last tutor session together before we would be out for Christmas break. It was nothing big. I bought a Christmas mug and filled it up with assorted chocolates, then wrapped it cute. I will never forget how happy he was though. He was in complete shock over the simple gift I gave him. He wouldn't stop telling me thank you and he had the hugest smile plastered on his face. He wasn't just being polite either. It was one of those things where I could tell he was sincerely excited that I had thought of him.

I thought to myself, "Dude, it's just a mug with candy in it. Settle down."

But I think it was so special to him because some prideful athlete that started out thinking she was too good for him, had actually taken the time to think of him. My heart broke a little. That was the last time I ever saw my tutor. I hope he is happy. I wish I would have been better to him and gotten to know his story better. I feel bad.

I am not supposed to talk about my job a lot, but it tears me apart sometimes, working with these wonderful kids that don't get to experience certain things. Once when I was in the changing room with a boy, I randomly started bawling because I thought about how other boys his age were out chasing girls and doing silly boy things. . .things he would never get to experience. I felt like the biggest idiot, just randomly starting to cry in that room. I forced myself to gain back control, so I could go back out with the rest of the staff.

Today I had one of those bitter moments where I wanted to randomly cry again. I was at the fieldhouse, running on a blasted treadmill, looking out over the indoor track and field. It was early, so there was a 7:30 class just starting on the track. I don't know what the class is exactly, but it basically reminds me of one of my high school track practices. They do different stretches, warm up, and run their guts out, yadda, yadda, yadda. I took interest in a particular guy in the class though. He was actually in my ward last year, and he lived with one of my guy friends. My friend always told me how weird he was. I realized I had never even taken the time to talk to the guy. Maybe said hi when I was over at their apartment, but that was about it. He was trying really hard to do all that was requested of him, but he was really struggling. He just isn't the athletic type. I noticed he wasn't really socializing with anyone either. He looked alone. And at that moment, I felt like the ugliest, most evil person alive. Why did I not ever try making friends with him? How could I be so selfish? I wondered if he had any close friends. I wondered if he loved a girl, or if a girl loved him. I hoped with all my heart at that moment, that he would find a girl to love him.

Am I ridiculous or what guys?

But I thought about how it wasn't fair. No one should be alone. No one should single someone out for being "weird" or "not cool". And everyone should have the right to be loved. I felt a bit depressed the rest of the morning. . . .until. . . .

something wonderful happened.

I was walking to Old Main, and snow was softly falling off the trees and glittering down around me. It was a beautiful scene, but what I saw happening within the scene was even more beautiful. My Math 1010 teacher was walking along, holding hands with a woman. Then he stopped and gave her a hug and softly touched her face. My broken heart from earlier was instantly mended. Let me tell you why.

My math teacher was, well, an odd duck. But so nice. The nicest guy ever. He was just kind of a slob. Overweight, unkept gray hair, thick glasses, and he always seemed so nervous. Kids in my class were kind of mean to him too. Just because they could be, because he is the type of person that just gets pushed around a lot. I always felt so bad. I would always smile and tell him thank you after class, hoping maybe that made him feel special. I also hoped he had a lady. I prayed he had a lady. If he had someone to love him, then everything would be fine, and my mind could be at peace. He is an older guy and he never had a wedding band on his finger. I began to have my doubts and figured he was just a lonely, old man whose only joy was teaching math. Sad, I know.

So seeing him with a lady seriously made my day!! Especially after the gym incident. My old math teacher has given me hope that the guy at the gym has a lady, and that maybe my tutor has picked up a girl as well.

Like the Beatles say, "All you need is love."

Speaking of the Beatles, my dad and brother went to the Beatles Love show in Vegas. I was jealous. . .but they did bring me back a pretty sweet Beatles shirt.

And on the note of love, this Friday the 28th will mark one year that I've been crushin on this boy. . .

Five Feel Goods

I have decided that about once a week, I just want to post five things that are currently making me happy. Things that make my life that much richer and more enjoyable.

So here is my first "Five Feel Goods" ever! Enjoy!

This owl rug from Urban Outfitters is just splendid. The owls make me happy. The colors make me happy. I am half-tempted to purchase this rug and save it for when I have a little home of my own.




Articles of clothing in bright colors. Like my raspberry jacket paired with the new teal scarf I bought last week. Bright colors like these chase away any trace of winter blues I might have.

Shar pei dogs. I want one. Really bad. Looking at pictures of them makes me smile, so owning one would probably make me roll on the ground with laughter. I just want to push all their wrinkles up over their faces. I would maul one with love if I owned one. Actually, my very first dog was one of these. Her name was Ruffles. She was my parents' baby before I came along. Then Ruffles wasn't an only child any longer.

McDonald's fruit smoothies. I prefer the wild berry. If you ever see me at McDonalds, I am most likely purchasing one of these. Or breakfast. Otherwise, I will not set foot near McDonalds. It's no jamba. . .but then again, it's way cheaper than jamba.

My Burt's Bees with pomegranate oil is one of the best things to ever happen to my lips. Seriously. It is a superb defense against Logan's mean winter winds. It keeps my lips feeling so smooth and soft. Plus it has just a bit of color to it. Bless Burt and his bees.

2010 Recap

So I know it is a little late in the game, but I decided I still want to reflect back on the year of 2010. Since it was pretty good to me and all. 2010 was an interesting year. It's not like a whole bunch of spectacular, out-of-this-world things happened to me, but I really feel like I found myself as a person. I spent the last year truly growing up and discovering the person I am, as well as the person I want to become.

Here's your recap of my 2010. . .

I walked into a random hair salon one day and had my hair chopped off.

I sent my fish, Chocoball, to fishy heaven.

And then welcomed Akon into my home.

I started dating BWell.

He was even my valentine. We made this cake. It was the first time I actually celebrated Valentine's Day. . .and it was kind of fun.

I competed at the WAC Indoor Track and Field Championship. Here I am doing shot, my least favorite event in the multi. I honestly think I liked the 800 more than doing shot. And the 800 is a killer race. It was a good experience, but I'm glad I don't have to do it again. I got a fancy WAC jacket for going though.

I went on a roadtrip with Shay and Piper to Vegas. Can't wait to go back when I'm actually 21 (this year, baby!).

I watched these two goofs get their nails done. However, I did not participate. Instead I made friends with the Oriental man that worked there.

I spent a whole morning making Brian a pretty legit birthday cake for his 22nd birthday.

I discovered my love for making cupcake creations. I also took a cake decorating class with my mom. My mom was way better than our teacher.

I followed the Old Farm ducks around. Basically every day.

I went to California with the fam, where we spent our time at the beach and the race track.

I wanted a circle skirt really bad. So I made one.

I went to Lagoon. Twice in the same month.

Rachel came from Florida and stayed with me.

I spent countless summer evenings putting henna on my body, as well as many family members, friends, and neighbors.

I floated the river several times, jeeped, had cookouts. All kinds of Idaho girl type things.

Archimedes came into my life. I can't say how he came though.

I started my second year at Utah State University.

I went to quite a few fun concerts.

Picked up a new hobby. Hiking.

Went on a fair amount of horse rides.

I took part in being an obnoxious USU sports fan.

I played lots of volleyball with these lovely ladies.

I got all dressed up with Shayla for her 20th birthday.

I went to the HOWL dressed like an owl.

I got in my first legit car accident ever. In which we rolled several times into the Logan river. No one was injured.


Holidays with the family.



I turned 20!!!

Oh, and I fell in love. Yep, I said it. Let's get real, we all know it's true. So I'm finally not going to live in denial.

I have a feeling that 2011 is going to be my biggest year yet. I am stoked.

Dream On

"Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity. It causes him to describe the beautiful as ugly and the ugly as beautiful, and to confuse the true with the false and the false with the true."

Martin Luther King Jr.

Dr. King amazes me so much. The best people in the world are the ones that go through a great amount of trials, but still maintain a positive attitude. It would have been easy for him to hate the white man. But he didn't. He always preached against hate. If only we could remember his words of wisdom constantly. There are just too many haters in the world.

Like his quote above says, hate causes man to describe the beautiful as ugly and the ugly as beautiful.

I spent Martin Luther King Day off from school and went snowboarding with BWeller and his family. I have just learned how this winter, and I think it is pretty fun. My whole life I lived in fear of going snowboarding or skiing, with my basketball coach threatening us to never go. So I never did in high school. Coach Line's one and only rule,

"Never go snowboarding. If I find out you have. . .you are off the team."

While being up in the mountains, I realized, once again, how beautiful this planet is. All the beauty is a little mind-boggling, really. So even though winter is a little cold and bitter at moments, I don't want to be a hater. Because all that snow, the pines, mountains as far as the eye can see. . .gosh, it is beautiful.

P.S. I have to say, I'm pretty proud of myself for picking up on the whole snowboarding thing. I still am not sure which foot I like having forward. . .but whatever. Maybe I'm an ambidextrous snowboarder. I have always wanted to be ambidextrous. And I only got stuck on a catwalk once, in which I got unstuck thanks to a little boy that was skiing past. He stuck his ski pole right at me and asked if I wanted a pull. Bless his soul for helping out the awkward adult.

Red Lips

Today, I rewarded myself with a treat for making it through the first week of spring semester. I bought myself a tube of red lipstick. I usually stick to more pinkish lip colors, or nude colors, but I'm taking the plunge and going red.

I bought a tube of Maybelline Are You Red-dy. It is glorious. Gorgeous. I love it.

The beauty of red lipstick, is you don't have to wear any eye make up. Just put on some red lipstick for a fresh look. This is great, because I find it annoying to wash eye make up off. Yep, I'm pretty lazy when it comes to my make up routine.

So now I can run out the door with bold lips of red, feeling fresh and free.

Or what the heck, I'll play up my eyes a bit WITH the red lips as well. Just for nights when I go out on the town. Like tonight. I have a hot date with Mr. Brian Weller.

I am going to feel like a movie star with my new red lips.

ps.. I love this dress that Taylor is wearing.