Green Beans

You know when you have one of those days that it seems like the whole world hates you? Like every possible thing that could go wrong. . .goes wrong. And all day you just pray for the day to go by fast so it can end? Like you wanna go crawl in your bed and hide? Or throw dishes at the wall so you can break something, just to feel it break? Yeah, we've all had a day like that. And to put it plainly, those days just suck. I had a bad day like that, but it didn't end. One bad day turned into about four bad days. So I've basically had a bad week. As if bad days aren't bad enough.

My stress level has been through the roof this week. I am the kind of person who has a high tolerance for stress might I add. Things can go wrong for me that would freak other people out, but things don't really get to me that easily. I feel like I'm pretty good about shaking things off. I know how to roll with whatever happens and make the best of it. Sometimes this probably isn't good, because things that should worry me, don't. I also like being busy, so I take on tons of tasks all at once, and I actually like it. But I guess this week, my pile of tasks got too high and too many things that didn't go my way knocked my pile of tasks to the floor (that sentence sounds awkward, but I don't care. We accept awkward people so we should accept awkward sentences sometimes).

I could make a mega long list of everything that lashed out on me this week, but I won't. I don't want to bore you and I really hate complainers, and I would not want to have to hate myself. So just be creative and think of a zombie Kelsey with no sleep walking about, and you can create for yourself bad things that happened to me. That will be much more fun for everyone. So if you secretly don't like me and you're reading this, feel free to drop a piano on me if you will.

However, Wednesday night, as I was feeling bad for myself and wondering what could go wrong next, I started doing some serious thinking. Maybe everything bad was happening to me because I was looking for the bad. Instead of looking for any good, I was putting all my focus on the horrible. Instead of trying to be happy, I was choosing to drown in a bathtub of my self-pity.

Happiness really is a choice, my friends.

Just as I was thinking this, I watched as a shooting star shot across the sky. Look at that, a wish for me! At this time, I was driving home to Weston, so I could go to my 7:30 am hair appointment (who needs sleep, right?). When I turned on our lane to drive up the hill, I felt a huge smile creep onto my sleepy face. My dog, Ringo was greeting me. Ringo loves me, I won't even try and deny it. Every time, without fail, that I come home, he runs to the bottom of the hill and then runs back up alongside my van. He did this like he does every other time. When I threw the van in park after I pulled into our driveway, I saw Ringo sitting patiently by my door, just like always. I smiled because I knew what would happen next. I threw the door open and Ringo jumped inside, onto my lap. I felt important having someone so excited to see me, even if it was just a dog. My other dog, with only three legs, greeted me shortly after. I love my puppies.

The next morning, I found some more happy things waiting for me to find them. Before I stepped inside my van, I looked at the mountain right behind our house, and my jaw dropped. The mountain is covered with trees, and the leaves are all changing colors. The mountain was illuminated with oranges, reds, and yellows. Then I remembered a time when I was younger, and that mountain was bare of all trees, due to a horrible fire caused by a summer lightening storm. That mountain has came a long way since then.

Then, I drove down the road a ways to find another pleasant surprise. The sun hadn't been up long, so everything was bright. I looked past the rays of sun to see two baby deer in the road. They were quite young, and so adorable. I scared them pretty bad, and they didn't know what to do. They ran one direction, then the other, then the other. I looked around and saw no mommy. Mommy deer are always close to their babies. Then I noticed lying in the weeds, a dead deer. Probably the mommy. That made me sad. "At least when I feel lost, I have a mommy," I thought.

The rest of the day, I tried looking for more good things, and I found quite a few:

1. I got my hair colored, and it feels nice.






2. I think I did well on my video editing quiz. I think.






3. Shayla let me have a yummy muffin she made.






4. I wore my new shirt which was only $7 and is super cute. I got several compliments on it as well.






5. My mom bought me owl earrings.






6. I felt the warm sun on my shoulders.






7. I played volleyball.






8. My boss gave me a rootbeer float AND a doughnut.






9. Brian made me dinner.






10. Brian took me to a movie.






11. Brian bought me a Mountain Dew and TWO candy bars for the movie.






12. Brian didn't dump me after I randomly started crying at the end of the night.
    

So this week was a little rough, but things are getting better. They always do. I decided it's kind of like green beans. I hate green beans. I think they are disgusting. And I am not picky when it comes to food. I will eat them, but I don't particularly love them.

But I remember when I was little, and I never wanted to finish my green beans. My dad would always say,

"You can't have dessert until you finish ALL your green beans."

ALL of them? Seriously? And taking dessert away from me was like the worst thing possible. So I'd gag those green beans down so I could have whatever dessert my mom had made. Every time the green beans started to taste real bad, I would think about the taste of chocolate I could soon have in my mouth. It always helped. Always.

My week has been a plate full of green beans, but it sure is easier when I think of the chocolate I'll eat when the beans are all gone. And I'll be having that chocolate soon.

DATE NIGHT