Truth Tuesday

• It's time to be completely honest. . . I just don't love blogging anymore. I am not sure exactly what that means for the future of this blog. Maybe nothing. Maybe it's just a phase and I'll fall in love with it all over again. Maybe I'll keep it up with the inconsistent spurts of posts. Or maybe I'll eventually stop all together. I just don't know. But I do know that my life is changing. I started this blog while in school after the Department Head of Journalism said to me, "If you want to be a good journalist, you need to write and read something every day." So I started this blog as a way to write something and put it out there for someone else to read, hoping that it might strengthen my writing skills. Then I watched as blogging turned into a coping mechanism for me. It was really a means of escape for me while in school. When I felt stressed and needed to take a break from editing and appointments and homework, I would write. I would write here, on this blog. There were no deadlines, no expectations, no grades. For a moment I could just turn away from my to-do list and write out my jumbled thoughts in a blog post. This blog was my outlet. Now I am at this weird transition in my life. I feel like I have control of my time more and it's so nice. When I do have a spare moment nowadays, I think of writing a blog post but the desire is not there. Maybe that's a sad thing, but I think maybe more than anything it's a healthy thing. I think it's a sign that my life is good. Don't get me wrong, life was good before, but I don't necessarily need to come to this blog on a regular basis as a means of escape like I did before. I don't have to live through this blog. I don't have to justify myself through this blog. Perhaps soon I'll be back for more blogging. Who knows. But for now, I am enjoying how it feels to just be.  Is this normal?   

• I am now serving in my church ward as an assistant camp director for girls camp as well as a leader for activity days. I am stoked! I love spending time with the youth. It's such a cool experience to see them progress and develop goals. Today we went horse back riding with our girls for activity days. The girls bundled up and braved the rainy weather. It was a blast! After we dropped the girls off (we all live in an area of town homes) one of the gals dropped by my place and gave me a little bouquet of flowers she picked. I put them in a vase on my kitchen table and thought of how my mom used to always do that with all the flowers we brought her. That cute girl made my night though, although I feel slightly bad she picked someone else's flowers. Sorry! 

• I think holidays on Mondays are just about the best thing to ever happen to our calendar.

• On that subject, my long weekend earned an A+. We went on several different hikes, hung out with friends and family, had a fire up the canyon where we roasted hot dogs and mallows, ate burgers at barbecues, and we cleaned our patio up and planted flowers. It was a productive weekend. 

• My only regret from this weekend is that we didn't make it to the cemeteries this year for Memorial Day. I feel guilty. Honestly, Memorial Day has always been one of my favorite holidays. I have wonderful memories of visiting different graves with my family. I would set the flowers carefully next to the tombstone while the adults would tell me the stories of my deceased family members and ancestors. I guess I've always had a journalist in me because as a kid I loved hearing stories about these people who were my relatives. One day, I hope I can remember the stories of those who passed on well enough that I can tell them to my own kids and take them to visit the graves.    

Lost with Friends

A couple Saturdays ago, I met up with some of my longtime friends. We were kind of attached at the hip in high school and have still stayed close. Granted, Shayla was my roommate after high school and we still hang out often, but I'm still proud of the fact that I've stayed so close with my high school chums. They were even bridesmaids at my wedding (tender). 

I love that we can go for months at a time without seeing each other or talking much but as soon as we meet up, it feels like we've never been apart. It's also great that so many different personalities can come together to form this thing called friendship. Shayla is the sweet one. Catherine is the funny one. Abbie is the happy-go-lucky one. I'm the quirky one. Friendship is wonderful. 

We set out on a hike which we expected to be only a couple miles long. Needless to say, we got very lost and ended up covering much more ground than we planned to. There were lots of comments like: Are we going the right way? and Which direction is the car? and That bee is huge! But it was a hoot and we all made it back to the car eventually, so that was good.

Four girls lost in the wilderness is a scary thought, but we didn't mind. We wandered around aimlessly and laughed about how ridiculous our situation was, all while reminiscing, eating Twizzler Pull 'N' Peels, playing Truth or Dare, and deciding how we would ration out our PB&J sandwiches if things went real sour and we ended up lost for days.  

Love you long time, girls. Let's get lost somewhere together again soon. Maybe next time at the lake or movie theater since Abbie aint a hiking fan. 

Truth Tuesday

• I have ombre hair nowadays (it's been like this for several weeks now and I'm just a terrible blogger). It was one of those things where I couldn't really believe I was doing it because there were very few ombres I saw on people that I liked. Not only that, but everyone was doing it. I guess it's kind of like that part in Mean Girls: "I saw Cady Heron wearing Army pants and flip flops, so I bought Army pants and flip flops." That's me and my ombre hair I guess. I really do like it a lot though.

• One of my favorite smells is freshly trimmed grass. I get to smell it quite often now that spring is fully upon us and summer is knocking at the door. Spring is filled with good smells. Blossoms, rain, and fresh cut grass. Ah, my heart. 

• I used the bathroom at work the other day and the toilet wouldn't flush. I had no idea what to do. I helplessly lifted the top off and tried pulling and twisting a few things as I hoped for the best. Nothing I did seemed to help. So I went to the nice secretary lady to tell her. Only she wasn't there. So what did I do? I went back to work and didn't tell a soul (until now). I let it be the next person's problem. I know, I am a terrible person. But I felt so embarrassed about approaching one of the men I work with and being all like, "Hey, since you've been training me all week could you also train me on how to work the toilet? I peed in there and it won't flush." Yeah, not awkward at all. All I can say is I'm going back to holding it and never using the bathroom at work again. 

• My wrists are sore from the half marathon I ran on Saturday. How is that possible? Why, I don't really know. My dad started teasing me and asked if I run on my hands now. I will assure you that I have not reached that level of insanity yet. I still stick to just my two legs. However, it was pouring rain the entire duration of the race and my hands got really cold around mile four. I think I may have clenched them for the majority of the race. Oops. I must admit though, I feel pretty hardcore that I ran in freezing rain. And of course the whole week before the race it was sunny and in the 80's every day. It's fine. I'm over it.  

• I wanted these sandals from Target oh so bad but bought a pair of wedges instead. Now I'm glad I did because I've seen these sandals every-freaking-where. Apparently a lot of people out there have good taste. They are cute, but I can't buy them now.

• I have the Great Gatsby soundtrack on repeat. Also, the movie is grand. So grand that I want to go see it a second time. This is serious stuff because I rarely rewatch movies. I've heard a lot of mixed reviews on the movie and here's my take on it: Loved it. Be prepared for your brain to be overstimulated. There is a lot to look at. At times the cinematography is a bit over the top, I'll admit. But for the most part, it's absolutely beautiful to watch. Also, the majority of the dialogue is taken straight from the book, which this girl really appreciates. Any thoughts on the movie from those who saw it?  

Always Aggies

Remember that one time when we graduated from Utah State University? That was a good day (which I was actually surprised about). I waited all day long for something to go terribly wrong. You see, high school graduation was a close disaster. I barely made it on time after my less than reliable van broke down and I couldn't get a hold of anyone to come and save me. I remember jetting in, out of breath with my cap sliding off my head. Whew, that was stressful.

USU graduation was low stress. It was a beautiful sunny day. My hair curled just how I wanted it to. And I was surrounded by all my favorite people. Win. Win. Win.

Brian also walked with me so we avoided going through two college ceremonies. Thank the heavens. I appreciate him so much for being supportive and willing to walk with my college so I could be with all my friends and news peeps. What a guy. I am happy he made me a True Aggie years ago while standing on that block "A" by the light of a full moon. And even more happy he made me his wife. Sometimes I wonder why in the world we got married so young. Are we crazy? Well yes, we are. But there isn't anyone in the world I'd rather be crazy with.

 So there you have it. We are USU alumni now. I'll be that obnoxious mother who one day buys my newborn Aggie apparel. I'll probably also play the "Scotsman" on loop next to my belly while the babe is in the wound. Settle down, now. I'm merely being sarcastic.

Now we have diplomas, grown-up jobs (okay, Brian already did), and graduation robes that we have no clue what to do with. I'm thinking Halloween costumes. Zombie graduates maybe? Brian is considering wearing his around the house as a bathrobe. Hey, the fabric is quite silky. He might be onto something.

Also, that subtle chunk of dark hair is blue. Yeah, I think I'm really cool. I have Aggie Blue hair. 

Old and New

It's kind of silly how suddenly certain things in life can change while other things seem to hold still in time, never changing and forever the same. The past week has been a bit of a blur and I am watching my life transform into something new and good right before my eyes.

I have always appreciated change, even embraced it. Never in my life though, have I found myself rushing through a stage of life, wishing for it to just be over so I could move on to the next thing. As a little girl, I would listen to my peers around me excitedly say, "I can't wait to grow up and be a teacher," or, "I want to be a mommy," or, "I'm going to be the President of the United States." When someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always shrugged my little shoulders and simply stated, "I don't know. I just like being a kid."

And I've found myself saying a similar thing through each stage of my life. As I grew a few feet taller and found myself in high school, buying bras, dating boys, and toilet papering houses, I listened to my peers as they would complain about high school and how college would be so much better. But I never felt in a rush to graduate from high school. I liked high school and I was content while I was there. Then came college where I quickly adjusted and learned to love it. Sure, I missed high school at times, just as I missed being a child at times, but I knew the change of college was good. But yet again, I was in no kind of rush to get to the next step. I tried not to think too much about a career after my college education. And I never found myself yearning for a husband. I listened to other girls say, "I really just want to get married and have babies," as they snipped out magazine clippings of wedding gowns and cake designs all the while. And I just thought, not me. I don't need anyone right now. I just like being on my own.

Then as of last week, I was a married human holding a college diploma in my hands not knowing quite what to do next. I told myself maybe this was the end of my journey. Perhaps no one would hire me. Or perhaps I would only find jobs far away, causing Brian to have to change his career at the moment. I really didn't know. For one half of a second I even thought, "Crap. Is this the part where I have to start having kids?" I immediately started missing being a student. So much to the point that I began turning possible ideas of Master's Degrees over in my mind. Any excuse to go back to school, because as far as I knew I wasn't ready for the next stage of life yet. I didn't want change.

But a week ago, things miraculously fell into place. I was offered another job with Cache Valley Media Group on top of my deejay job on 94.5 VFX. They wanted me to be a reporter for KVNU and Cache Valley Daily. I excitedly accepted. Now I'm a full-time working girl and I can't even believe how right this moment in life feels. This is exactly where I need to be. I started reporting on Monday and immediately fell in love. My first week at work has felt in many ways similar to my first week of elementary school. Everything around me is new and exciting and I just want to bounce up and down and run home and tell someone. Just like after my first day of first grade when I exclaimed to my mom how exciting PE was, and how beautiful the lunch trays at the cafeteria were, and how we got three recesses! THREE! Yeah, that's a lot how this career thing feels.

Another big change happened last week when my little brother received his mission call. We all drove to Malad, Idaho to bombard my dad at work in the middle of the day so Jace could open that wonderful envelope. And it was kind of weird to sit in my dad's office that hasn't changed much over the years (more recent photos have been added to the walls with all the old ones) and listen as Jace read he'd been called to serve in the Rancho Cucamonga, California mission. I'm afraid I will miss him terribly. I can't imagine him being away for two whole years.

As we walked out of my dad's tire shop, a tinge of sadness hit me as I took in deep breaths of rubber. Most people probably don't enjoy the smell of tires but it's one of my favorites. I think because it's nostalgic for me. I instantly think of being little and visiting Dad at work, Jace and I would weave in and out of the stacks of tires like it was a maze made just for us. Or I think of Dad pulling into the house at the end of the day. I would run to greet him, he would hug me, and I would bury my face in his shoulder that smelled of oil, gasoline, and rubber all mixed together. That smell made me happy.

After the opening of the mission call, we headed over to The Dude Ranch. It's this delicious restaurant where the owner cooks all the food. I grew up eating there and it hasn't changed a bit in all these years.

This post is really just rambling. But I guess I'm just trying to say that I'm grateful. I'm grateful for change. I am so glad I can progress in this life. And I am realizing that one of the greatest feelings is to learn how to be happy with yourself and where you're at in life. Sure, there is always room for improvement. However, I am realizing more and more how very essential it is to savor the present. It'll be gone in a flash. I'll never forget something my high school English teacher told us when we asked him what his favorite stage of life had been so far (he was in his late fifties/early sixties at the time). He thought about it a moment and then replied, "Right now. I think every time I reach a new stage in life it becomes my favorite." How beautiful is that? Sure, it's okay to reach back to the past sometimes and remember what was. And it's okay to look ahead to the future and plan for what is to come. But I think my favorite part, and the part I want to always focus on most is the now. I want to always be able to say, "Right now is my favorite."      

Sunday Best: Mommas and Maxis

maxi dress: Forever 21, chambray top: Ross, oxfords: Fashion Box, headband: Hobby Lobby 

After getting lost in the wilderness on Saturday for three hours while hiking with my girlfriends, I rushed home and had, oh, fifteen minutes to get ready and take my mom out for Mother's Day dinner with the rest of the family. My bathroom turned into a bit of a circus to say the least. And that's when the maxi dress came to the rescue and said, "Don't cry, Kelsey. Put me on and you'll forget all about the dirt in your hair and the sweat on your brow." And that's why maxis rock. They are cute and comfortable, a great combination. 

And just as maxis are comforting and lovely, so are moms (there's an awkward transition for you). I am not sure what I would do without my mother. She has always been my number one fan, she came and cheered me on at every high school basketball game even though she never understood any of the rules. She hugged me, rubbed my back, and let me cry all while watching Phantom of the Opera five times in a row once when a high school boyfriend dumped me. She taught me that everyone and everything deserves to be loved with all the ugly and homeless animals she brought home to take care of. She taught me to laugh it off when things go wrong and to always try again. She's one of the first people I turn to for advice and I love her dearly. Happy Mother's Day to all the mother figures out there. I have plenty of other women to thank besides just my own mom for being motherly examples to me. Aunts, grandmas, my mother-in-law, teachers, coaches, moms of friends, neighbors . . . you all know who you are . . . thanks for showing me constant examples of love and service. I would burn every maxi skirt and dress I laid eyes on to prove my appreciation for you ladies, and that's serious business.   

Truth Tuesday

•  I thought I was bad at riding bikes . . . good thing I didn't live back when they rode big wheelers like ^^that one. 

• Why do people talk on the phone or even use their phone at all while in a public restroom? Gross. So if you are going to text while doing your business, at least turn your phone to silent. Then I won't have to hear it as I'm peeing.

• I am now a USU grad. A post soon to come. 

• I am very passionate about not texting while driving. Put the phone down. It can wait. I think this music video does a good job portraying the dangers of driving irresponsibly. Watch it. You will be moved PLUS you get to enjoy three of my favorite country artists. ;) 

• Working as a radio deejay tempts me way too much to blow a bunch of money on iTunes. Don't worry. I've refrained. 

• Anyone else going to see this movie next weekend? I am so looking forward to it. Now I just have to find some time to finish the book! 

• Speaking of "The Great Gatsby", anyone agree with me that Leonardo DiCaprio is getting better looking with each passing year? 

• I am sort of obsessed with this song. And you should be too. 

• This video cracks me up. That twelve year old kid has some guts. What do you think? Was the kid out of place or was it the cop? 

• My little bro turned 19 over the weekend, and he should be getting his LDS mission call any day now. It's sort of freaking me out. I will openly accept any advice on coping while a sibling is away serving as a missionary. I am so happy my brother is going to serve, but I'm selfish and will miss him like crazy. HELP!   

Advice from Senior Kelsey

I jotted down this list yesterday after taking my (gulp) final final. I can't believe it's over.

If I could sit and talk to Freshman Kelsey, I would tell her a few things.

-I would tell her to never sleep in and skip a class. There will be plenty of time to sleep, and never enough time to learn.

-I would tell her to go to bed at a decent hour. Staying up all night every night isn't cool and it won't help your GPA much either.

-I would tell her to worry less about dating and boys and to focus more on herself. That whole boy thing will work out on its own.

-I would tell her to take full advantage of all the benefits offered to USU students.

-I would tell her to make an effort to connect with professors. Some of them sincerely care about you and want to help you succeed at what you are good at.

-I would tell her to always carry that dang student ID card with her. You never know when or where you'll be able to use it to get a deal.

-I would tell her not to stress out about her future. Things will work out. They always do. As long as you're doing what's right and working hard, an opportunity will appear when you least expect it.

-I would tell her to get dressed for class in the mornings. Yeah, I get it. You have track practice in the afternoon. But that's still no excuse for not caring. Save the sweatpants for Saturday mornings.

-I would tell her to never worry about what other people think of her. There are lots of weird people at college. You can act as weird as you want and someone might think you are actually refined. So just be yourself. There's no better place to do that than at college.

-I would tell her to not be afraid of trying new things. They just might become your favorite things. And this is not implying to drugs or other illegal happenings. I am talking about stuff like taking an African Dance class.

-I would tell her to take every chance she could to lay on the quad or the grass on Old Main Hill and just soak in the beauty of the most magical campus around.

-I would tell her to believe in that football team, even though they can barely beat SUU at the moment. Just you wait. It gets better. I promise. Chuckie Keaton. Ever heard of him?

-I would tell her to stop complaining about the cold while walking around to classes during the winter months. Just embrace it. Sure, you can't feel your nose. So what, you might slip to your death on the icy sidewalk. But remember how lucky you are to be getting a good education.

-I would tell her to go out of her way to stop the person she knows on campus who pulls out their phone to do the "fake text message" in order to avoid conversation. Don't let them get away with that nonsense. You stop them and give them the biggest, friendliest hello and make sure they feel totally awkward in the process.

-I would tell her to always remember to call her mom. And her dad too.

-I would tell her to never eat the food at The Hub. Bad news bears.

-I would tell her to keep a better journal.

-I would tell her to always stick up for herself.

-I would tell her to soak up every second. You thought those four years of high school went by fast? Just wait for the four years of college to whiz by.

-And I would tell her to constantly be proud of being an Aggie. But she probably already knew that.