Different Flavors

A few weeks ago, I was feeling so over the internet. Everywhere I turned in the world of social media, there just seemed to be meanness, bitterness, bullying and arrogance. I am the type of person who really absorbs the energy of others too, so I try to be really careful about not only who I'm chilling with in person, but also about who is filling up my feed on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter. When I see someone on Facebook complaining a lot or posting really angry things, I've found there is nothing wrong with hiding their posts from my wall. I don't need their negative energy in my life. It's just silly.

I recently even thought about deleting my social media accounts, taking a hiatus, but then I thought, "No Kelsey, don't let the negative and angry people win. Don't let them rule the internet." So there's that. I'm still here, trying to send a little sliver of my own love and optimism into this (sometimes vicious) world wide web. That's the thing, while there are a lot of meanies on the internet, I also see a lot of love and goodness being spread around by people, and I adore that. But dude, the bullying and shaming has got to stop. It's crazy to me how cruel people will be when they can hide behind a computer or phone screen. The sad part is, I think a lot of bullies have built their confidence up so much while hiding behind a screen, that the bullying is even coming across in face-to-face interaction.

After deciding to stay on social media, I had to take a step back and look at myself. What kind of material was I posting on my own accounts? Could I be more positive? Was I being the bully sometimes? The answer to both of those questions is: yes. The thing is, we all get passionate about certain topics and we all want to believe that the way we do things is best. Maybe the way I do things is best for me, but I need to realize that it's not going to be best for everyone (and that's totally cool). I'm LDS. Being religious makes me feel happy and whole. Are my beliefs going to make everyone happy? Probably not. I'm an avid runner. If you don't run, does that make you stupid? No, that idea is stupid. I love animals and could play with them all day. If you don't like animals or you are allergic, does that automatically make you a jerk? No. I got married young. Should everyone get married young? Of course not.

I'm hearing talk all the time of being more "open-minded". The truth is, we live in a society where no one is truly open-minded. We don't know how to respect the opinions and lifestyles of others. We are turning into a people so concerned with being heard and respected that we are forgetting to listen and be respectful. Someone can live a different lifestyle than me and be happy. More so, someone can live a different lifestyle than me and be a super good person.

I really love ice cream. Like, I really love it. I love it so much that we even had Cold Stone Creamery at our wedding. My very favorite flavor at Cold Stone is Chocolate Devotion (chocolate freak over here). It's chocolate ice cream with chocolate sauce, chocolate shavings, and brownie mixed in. YUM. Do I think every single person needs to order Chocolate Devotion just because it's my favorite? No! There are a lot of people who are not going to love eating that much chocolate. I get that. But it's still my favorite and it makes me the happiest. Sure, there are other flavors I like but there's nothing that hits the palate quite like Chocolate Devotion. On one occasion, I had a friend tell me how great Birthday Cake Remix was. I NEEDED to order it. Well, I try my best to be open-minded so I gave Birthday Cake Remix a shot. It was just okay. With every bite of cake batter though, I found myself wishing it was chocolate-flavored. So I didn't love Birthday Cake Remix. Guess what? I'm still friends with the girl who does love it. And she loves me even though I have an unhealthy obsession with chocolate.

 I realize that religious beliefs, political opinions and lifestyle choices are much more complex than ice cream flavors. But you know what's never complex? Kindness. We need more of that. We need less people worried about being right and more people worried about being kind.

I recently met another girl who was my same age (24). She didn't seem very happy with life, at least not to me, but maybe I was wrong. Who am I to judge? I was trying to be friendly, asking her questions about herself. In return, she was sort of rude. The only thing she asked me was this, "So you're only 24? Isn't that a little young to be married?" I really wanted to be snarky back and say, "Aren't you a little old to not have a job and be living with your parents still?" But I didn't say that . . . because I'm trying to practice this thing called choosing kindness. So I just smiled and said, "Yeah, I'm pretty young, but I'm also really happy."

It's amazing that you can go into an ice cream parlor and choose from a variety of flavors and toppings to make exactly what it is you are craving. Pick your flavor and enjoy it. Stop letting it melt away all over your filthy hand while you're busy judging what others choose to put in their own cone (or cup, because I'm not a huge ice cream cone fan).