tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post4497197845786375473..comments2023-10-11T02:37:38.590-06:00Comments on A Little Bird Told Me: Modesty, it's an Attitude Kelsey Keller Weller http://www.blogger.com/profile/11490355299620695779noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-26918044774060971812013-06-24T17:17:15.675-06:002013-06-24T17:17:15.675-06:00Thanks for your thoughts, Tyler. I have really app...Thanks for your thoughts, Tyler. I have really appreciated getting feedback from guys on this topic.Kelsey Keller Weller https://www.blogger.com/profile/11490355299620695779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-91415078796935542052013-06-24T17:15:37.224-06:002013-06-24T17:15:37.224-06:00"Sure, dressing modestly helps out the situat..."Sure, dressing modestly helps out the situation but I don't cover up because I'm afraid some boy is going to have sinful thoughts. I cover up because I understand the divinity of my body and the respect I deserve." ---Perfect point, Samantha. I couldn't have stated it better. Kelsey Keller Weller https://www.blogger.com/profile/11490355299620695779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-11136199551149624382013-06-24T17:14:25.472-06:002013-06-24T17:14:25.472-06:00Thanks, Bethany. I feel the same way. Perhaps the ...Thanks, Bethany. I feel the same way. Perhaps the sex object route seems like the easiest way of teaching modesty but I definitely think it's also the most harmful. I love what you say about teaching modesty in a way that is lasting, precious, and empowering. It definitely should be ALL of those things! Love!<br /><br />Let's eat cake. Kelsey Keller Weller https://www.blogger.com/profile/11490355299620695779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-28381788662034470442013-06-24T17:11:32.220-06:002013-06-24T17:11:32.220-06:00Anonymous, I wish I knew who you were because I ap...Anonymous, I wish I knew who you were because I appreciated your comment. You made some excellent points. I know I am often guilty of thinking too much about the clothes I put on my body. What can I say, I like pretty colors and patterns. However, there are much more important things to focus our time and attention on. <br /><br />I also love your input on the dirty mind bit. I have always been upset with how modesty becomes this huge responsibility on women, and often makes us feel like the problem. I always felt it was degrading to women. However, I see more and more how these views are equally degrading to men. You are right, we are all human and we will all have inappropriate thoughts at one time or another. And I am sure as a woman, I have lustful thoughts just as often as some men (gasp!). We just need to learn we are all responsible for our own thoughts and be supportive of one another (not pick women apart for dressing a certain way and not point fingers at men for thinking a certain way).<br /><br />Thanks for your comment! Kelsey Keller Weller https://www.blogger.com/profile/11490355299620695779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-50841789705165344292013-06-24T16:13:32.836-06:002013-06-24T16:13:32.836-06:00I agree with a lot of what you said:
Modesty in c...I agree with a lot of what you said:<br /><br />Modesty in clothing is more than an issue of showing skin and not showing skin. This is getting very much down to "spirit of the law" stuff, but it goes back to what you quoted about "drawing undue attention to ourselves." Wearing clothes simply to get compliments, joining clothing fads to fit in, trying to dress "cool" for attention...all in way or another could be immodest, with the connotation of immodesty as being "not humble." Regardless of what kind of skin is shown, I am much more put off by a girl that is clearly trying too hard to look "hot" or "cute" or whatever than a girl that just dresses within themselves and their personality.<br /><br />Second, I think we need to be careful when using the term "dirty mind." This always makes me think that a man who lets his imagination wander or who experiences lust, like, has some permanent condition. Like, one type of male has a "dirty mind" but can occasionally control them to have clean thoughts, and the other male has a "clean mind" but may occasionally let it slip. And those are the only two kinds! Ha ha. How about, we all just have a mind, we are all fighting the natural man and just trying our best! Let's differentiate between "a sin" and "sinner." I've looked at girls dressed modestly and had inappropriate thoughts. I've looked at girls dressed immodestly and haven't thought anything. I've looked at girls dressed immodestly and thought nothing at all. I've had inappropriate thoughts not looking at a girl at all. It is what it is. Let's stop assuming all men are in some kind of predetermined rut.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-74386906888095201182013-06-21T08:46:59.500-06:002013-06-21T08:46:59.500-06:00I love this post so much! I had a conversation wit...I love this post so much! I had a conversation with Josh the other day about the modesty issue, how it's pushed so hard on girls but in all the wrong ways- all about objectifying girls and not teaching them why the Lord would want us to show respect for our bodies. Maybe teaching the sex object route might seem easiest and would make the most sense to young girls, but teaching them to gain their own testimony about modesty and their body being a temple is so much more lasting, precious, and empowering. <br />And why does everyone want to victimize the man? Poor man, he can't control his bad thoughts so we must tell girls that it's all their fault. Really?? Why belittle men like that? They are not weak and powerless! Josh was really insulted by that as well.<br /><br />And great point about how judging the way other girls dress is not modest. Very well put!<br /><br />And seriously. I want some of that cake too. Bethany Growhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08015782363362910609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-67529578589018535712013-06-21T00:28:02.937-06:002013-06-21T00:28:02.937-06:00i wholeheartedly agree with you! I feel uncomforta...i wholeheartedly agree with you! I feel uncomfortable when I don't feel covered up enough, and it's not at all because I think some guy is looking at me and having fantasies. It's simply because I don't like having that much exposed. And like you said, I feel closer with my Heavenly Father when i'm modest. It always bothered me that people place the modesty issue all on guys' shoulders and basically say if something bad happens that "it's the girl's fault because they didn't have enough on and then didn't stop them." Like your husband said, guys have accountability, too! And contrary to popular belief, guys do in fact have control over their own thoughts. Ha. Plus, all of the reasons stated in the article have everything to do with what others think of you and not enough of what God thinks of you, and, most importantly, what YOU think of yourself. I liked what you said about being modest in other ways. I never thought about it like that. Anyway, I'm all over the place. Love this Kelsey! Megan Gaylehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01825914317401592238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-22790303325213374582013-06-20T22:57:41.774-06:002013-06-20T22:57:41.774-06:00pretty thought-provoking post; I haven't given...pretty thought-provoking post; I haven't given "Modesty in language and behavior" much thought before. I'm glad you quoted Brian's opinion about the article. My husband shares the same and I appreciate him for showing me a different (certainly loftier) point of view. The concept of modesty in dress sure gets tricky - a person can stand her own ground pretty easily, but then children come into the picture and opportunities of interacting with peers/youth groups. Then, modesty takes on different dimensions. I am thankful for guidelines, such as your quoted references.Colettehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00519556785414408241noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-21622529344856459202013-06-20T21:25:29.173-06:002013-06-20T21:25:29.173-06:00My thoughts are as follows: as a child I took my s...My thoughts are as follows: as a child I took my shirt off whenever I pleased and am very comfortable doing so when ever wnd where ever still to this day. I enjoy mowing my lawn without a shirt as to get my tan on I m trying to say I am comfortable in my skin. As for women doing us "men" a favor there is no favor like you said if a man is going to fantasize about you you just as well be naked it won't change what he is thinking. Also a freind of mine once tole me this " I was sitting on an optional beach and wanted to rent some chairs and a table so I turned to the topless woman next to me and asked her where exactly to pay the man. Through out the rest of the aftet noon I couldn't help but notice thst I wasn't checking out the topless or nude women but the ones that were covered up because I like to wonder" this goes along with saying a dirty mind is a dirty mind and almost saying the nore covered up the more there is to think about. Ok enough about that. The second thought that comes to mind was told to me by a preisthood leader "satin will put bad thoughts in your head all day long it is your choice weather you entertain them or not. Also things such as your haircut could be inmodest if you are using it to get a rise. So I beleive modesty is in the head and morals of me myself and I if I am comfortable then I am modest .Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15713595614726426595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8136486462952673370.post-85871570761206662692013-06-20T19:47:09.691-06:002013-06-20T19:47:09.691-06:00I agree, wholeheartedly. A lot of modesty discuss...I agree, wholeheartedly. A lot of modesty discussions put off the impression that men are mindless and dictated by their sex drive and it's all the girls' fault if he has impure thoughts. Neither men nor women are a piece of meat. Sure, dressing modestly helps out the situation but I don't cover up because I'm afraid some boy is going to have sinful thoughts. I cover up because I understand the divinity of my body and the respect I deserve. In marriage and serious relationships, you care about someone so deeply and you're attracted to them so fully that you could get your jollies off of a nightgown. Bikinis and modest dress aren't the end all be all for abstinence. <br /><br />Oh boy, I got carried away. In conclusion: I agree with you. Like, a lot. Ha.Samanthahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01395905037088285033noreply@blogger.com